Dear Theo

Dear Theo,

From the moment I first met you, I think we each knew that we were meant for each other. After driving 3 hours to Orlando in a raging storm to get you, I got out of the car and you immediately pulled towards me wagging your tail. I haven’t seen you do that to anyone since.

When we got to my apartment in Jensen Beach Florida, you walked in did your sniff around the house and then when presented with a toy, you immediately were ready to play fetch. Later that week, during a huge storm in the middle of the night, I was surprised to find you laying on top of me looking directly at me demanding safety cuddles from the thunder. After that you never used the crate again; my bed was now your bed too.

I knew I had less time with you than was fair, you were already 5 years old when I got you. I just thought we would have more time than we got.

You were always so smart, so fun and so goofy. Always a ham for the camera  you quickly stole everyone’s hearts. Kong toys were no match for your intelligence and drive to eat peanut butter.

I knew I could always count on you to greet me with a kiss when I got home, even to the end when I would kneel down for you to make sure it was me because your eyes were failing you. You never got into anything you shouldn’t have, except those few times where dirty tissues were involved.

You put up with me losing my job (with 200 other people) almost 4 years ago to the day we have to say goodbye to you. We drove across the country from Florida to California through 8 states. You were such a trooper to spend 10-14 hours in the car.

I can’t believe our time together is at an end. I’ve loved you every minute since July 23rd 2012. I’ll miss the way you pawed your toys like a bull ready to run just to show me you wanted to play or needed a cuddle. I’ll miss you ‘talking’ to get my attention even if you did it during the important parts of Game of Thrones (which seems so insignificant now). I’ll miss the way you’d knock over any water bottles on the floor just for fun. I’ll miss rubbing your cute rump and the way your tail would wag in circles when you were extra excited (your Wag-in Wheel). My showers won’t be complete without you popping your head in to make sure I was okay. I love the way you were fearless of swimming, diving straight into the deep end to save the ball from certain death. I’ll miss our bedtime routine of you walking up your steps waiting patiently on the bed for me to ask for a high-five and I’d give you a treat followed by a tummy rub. I’ll miss my nightly snuggle buddy who could only be comfortable by making sure your body was half on my leg. I’ll miss all of your silly quirks, and I’ll miss the jingle of your tag that let me know you were on the move.

Being a single dog parent is hard. I was on long days sometimes and long weeks too but you dealt with it like a champ. I’m sorry I wasn’t there for you more. 

I have so many wonderful memories of you that I’ll keep in my heart, and when it’s mended I’ll think about those to warm my spirit.

I can’t express how grateful I am you came into my life. You’ve been my unconditional friend, confidant and protector. I’m so proud to have been given the opportunity to be your person. You’ve been with me during the hardest times in my life and I’ll always be thankful for you. I’ll miss everything about you, but mostly I’ll just miss you. Seeing your warm brown eyes always so full of life and hope has been a daily gift that I’ll never forget.

The spark in those eyes is flickering out now, you’ve been battling kidney disease for 3 years and you’ve fought it bravely. Thank you for hanging on as long as you could. I don’t know what I did to deserve you and I don’t know what I’ll do without you. I know you long for peace and I will give you that last gift, as you have given me so many.

Thank you for choosing me.  No one will ever replace you; I’ll keep you in my heart always. You’ve been more to me then you’ll know. I love you.

you’re my good boy Theo,

your loving momma.

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